Badminton & Bowling June 26, 2007
Posted by pinoyronin in Uncategorized.Tags: badminton, bangkok, bowling, EFL, English, ESL, thailand
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I once read an interesting essay comparing Japanese conversation with American conversation. The writer, who was an American, compared the two to ball games. Americans talk like they are playing badminton (or tennis for that matter). One serves (i.e. initiates the conversation), then the other hits the birdie (or the ball if it’s tennis) and the other player tries to hit it and on and on. In short, there is direct interaction between the two parties. If there are more parties, they can play doubles.
The Japanese have a different way of conversing, according to the writer. They do it the way a bowling game is played. One player rolls the ball towards the pins, and whether he hits a strike or not, he moves on so that the other player can take his turn. Among the Japanese, the writer noted, one person can say something about the topic, then makes way for the next speaker. This second speaker neither makes an attempt to challenge or contradict the first one’s views, just says what he was supposed to say then move on.
I witnessed this live, in action, last Friday during our EFL class. There were no Japanese in the class, only Thais. But they might as well be Japanese, because they take pains to be polite to one another by not directly contradicting or questioning a classmate’s statements. They would simply nod their heads in agreement, murmuring, “Oh,” say their piece and move on.
There were no Americans either in that class. Just Lenka, our British colleague, who was there to observe, and myself.
The lesson was simple enough, especially for the guys at the Research Department most of whom have an average level of English use. I gave them a list of statements (like “Terminally ill people should be allowed to end their lives,” “Murderers should get the death penalty,” etc.) and pick one they have a strong opinion about (whether for or against) and share them with the class.
Everything was going well until it was the turn of Lek and Pet. They chose “Murderers should get the death penalty” and said they oppose it and proceeded to explain their position. Afterwards, the other class members shared their opinions, including Moo, a close friend of the two ladies.
Moo is a rarity among my Thai colleagues. He’s the only Thai who scowls often, shows his emotion openly, and utters words that are deemed impolite by his own countrymen. That afternoon, he expressed his opposing view and went on to challenge his two friends. The exchange went on for several minutes. It was like watching a badminton game, with each side hitting the birdie back to his opponent. It felt good after watching too many bowling games by the Thais. I certainly missed the heated debates my students always have in my classes in the Philippines, so this one was a welcome development. I can see Lenka was also engrossed.
And then it happened…
Pet, who at 23 was one of the youngest in the group and yet one who has a serious air about her, suddenly fired off a long stream of Thai at her friend Moo, with matching sharp eyes and serious countenance. Whoa! Everyone became quiet. Moo himself even blushed.
In my effort to break the ice, I asked in a tone which I hoped sounded amusing: “Alay na?” (What is it?) I always do this whenever my Thai officemates lapse into speaking in Thai to remind them that there’s a non-Thai in their midst who needs some translation pronto.
A moment later, I regretted it. For me, Pet’s was just a typical outburst during an emotional exchange of opinions, definitely nothing compared to the savagery I witnessed regularly in my classes back home. But for the Thais, it was a very awkward moment. Pet was so provoked and was so frustrated with her friend’s insistence on arguing with her about the death penalty that she had been forced to express her anger. In Thai culture, she lost face. It’s a big deal for them. Enough for her to mete out the death penalty on her friend if she had the chance, I guess.
The class broke up on a rather cool note after that, despite my efforts (and Lenka’s) to perk things up. Sawn, one of the more mature women in the group, suggested we talk about less serious matters next time. As in, more sanook (‘fun’). I had to agree.
I guess we’ll have more bowling games in the near future.
Pendejo June 8, 2007
Posted by pinoyronin in Uncategorized.Tags: Assumption, bangkok, international school, pendejo, sarasas, taxi, thai girls, thailand, Witthayu
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It was already 7:30 am when I was finally able to flag this yellow Toyota Vios taxi. Traffic was congested in Bangbon 3 and I was running late. As I always did every morning, I told the taxi driver, “Pay Thannon Wittayu na kap. Say nay pay Praram Song, Sappan Praram Khao, Praram Si (I’m going to Wireless Road. We pass by Rama 2 Road, then cross the Rama 9 bridge and exit at Rama 4.”
I shouldn’t have troubled myself. It turned out that driver could speak English. Just some problem with the tenses, along with the sing-song accent, but striking up a conversation with him didn’t prove to be as stressful as conversing with some of his countrymen.
Our exchange started with the usual, “Where are you from?” “I’m from the Philippines,” thing. When he learned that my wife teaches English at Sarasas Bilingual School, he became more interested.
“I have son, three years,” he explained. “Next year, go school. He learn English school. Salasat expensive?” Thais pronounce Sarasas as ‘Salasat.’
“Well, it’s definitely cheaper than Assumption,” I assured him. Assumption is one of the schools that charge a high tuition in Thailand. Only the international schools charge higher.
According to him, his son is being taken care of by his mother in the province. I forgot the name of the province (Its name is quite long) but it’s midway between Bangkok and Chiang Mai.
So you and your wife are working here in Bangkok? I asked him. He hesitated before answering. Yes, he said finally. My wife is also in Bangkok.
I complimented him on his English skills. He explained that he once studied in Ramkamheng University, though he wasn’t able to graduate. He started three courses but didn’t finish any.
He said he used to work as a traveling salesman in a company that sells bags. However, the Taiwanese-owned factory closed and relocated to China. That’s when his problems started. He and his wife had frequent quarrels and he later discovered that she even had a lover. “I work very hard, go to province, go home only Friday,” he explained. His wife must have grown lonely during his absences and had taken on a lover.
So they separated and he took his son to his mother. Once in a while, his wife would visit their son. The driver said he’s already 43. So you married late? I asked him.
No, have three wives long ago, he said. Now that’s a surprise. Ching may? Really? Ching ching, he said. Really-really.
But here’s the bombshell. He divorced his three earlier wives because…you guessed it: they also had taken on lovers.
He was staring ahead, his eyes fixed on the road, his face losing its smile, as he told me his story.
Great. What a story. A tearjerker.
Then I thought to myself, this guy’s really had bad luck Four of his wives took on lovers! Pendejo! I can imagine somebody playing a trumpet in the background.
Can somebody be that unlucky? Ang malas naman niya. Somehow his misfortune cast a shadow on an otherwise beautiful morning. I don’t want my day ruined just because a Thai driver shared his tales of woe with me.
“You can always get a new girlfriend!” I suggested, hoping to cheer him up.
“No, no have more girlfriend. No have wife. Same same. Just problems.” The way he shook his head was emphatic. “I take care my son. I’m happy my son. No have plans new girlfriend. Thai women, not honest.”
“Really? Do most Thai wives get lovers?”
No answer from him. Stupid question.
At that time we were already making a right turn to All Seasons’ Place. I noticed that the driver had been taking glances at the well-dressed Thai women on their way to their respective offices.
“Hhmm…Office girls pretty, na?” he remarked.
“Yes, sure, they’re pretty.” I answered, and then something dawned on me. I can’t suppress a smile. “Maybe this year will be luckier for you. You’ll have a pretty office girl as a new girlfriend, eh?”
Now, he smiled at that. “Kap, kap. Yes. Thank you. Hope so.” The bastard. One moment he was all pensive at getting four of his wives shit on his head, probably even vowing celibacy for the rest of his life, and now, the sight of those well-dressed, slim, fair-complexioned office girls changed his mind.
I’m really amazed at the Thais. I won’t be surprised if a Filipino murders his adulterous wife in a moment of passion. Our Malay blood, influenced in no small part by the equally fierce Hispanic heritage, will explain away such things. I can’t imagine a Filipino being wronged by his wife four times and not to commit murder.
But with the Thais…I guess they’re different. They can still remain complacent in the face of that kind of catastrophe.
But one thing that Thais and Filipinos share a similarity is in their capacity to hope… that one day they’ll meet the woman who would be honest and faithful to them.
The morning is beautiful, after all. I walked into the CRC Building lobby with my feet acquiring a certain sense of bouyancy.
